Triathlon Holiday Wishlist 🎁
A simple, accurate, and cheap guide on what to get your triathlon friends
Hey Friends 👋,
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Hope you enjoy this week's totally serious and not satirical at all newsletter on how to shop for a triathlete
Us triathletes are simple creatures. We never look at shiny equipment and think “I want that”. We just like cheap and simple items. So if you’re buying a gift for a triathlete this is your Complete guide to making us happy.
Mom, I hope you’re reading this!
So first to get started, something small. Maybe a stocking stuffer.
The Speedmax CFR Moonshot that retails for $16,600 CAD.
Again something small that is just like a nice gesture to someone you care about that you know works really hard.
Next, we’re helping that special someone get ready for their long day.
The Cm 6360 Milk Perfection Countertop Automatic Coffee Machine with 8 Programmable User Profiles Brilliantlight, heated cup rest, glass milk container, and wifi.
I’ll be damned if my coffee maker doesn’t have wifi. Also personal profiles are a nice touch, I want my coffee to know who I am. Highly recommend getting this for your athlete friend. Again this isn’t very expensive so maybe you can use this as a secret santa gift or something.
Kickr Smart Trainer
Stationary bikes are so passé. If you really want to please your triathlete, get them this Kickr Smart Trainer that’s currently going for $1,879.99 (It’s in CAD though so basically free). Wifi connectivity is a theme here. Unfortunately, this doesn’t come in hot pink, but I’ve been reassured the company is working on wraps for custom Kickrs.
Week stay in Hotel Boscolo + Private Jet Package
This is probably the most realistic. The Iron Man world championships is in Nice, France next year, so you could get a week stay at Hotel Boscolo, which is a pretty run down hotel. Let them be comfortable, but you don’t want to break the bank so at $667 a night it’s very realistic. But how are they going to get there? We got that covered too. Charter a private jet for right around $60,000 so they can get in the right mindset for the race. This gift makes the most sense out of all of them on the list if I’m being honest.
Okay I’m sorry. If you actually want to get someone you care about a gift for their triathlon career, I’d recommend getting them apparel. On the expensive side you can get bike suits, but that will still run you around $250. Bike shorts, swim kits, or nice training shoes is a great idea and probably the most affordable thing you can get. If they are very new check out different smart watches as well.
In all honesty if your friend or family member loves triathlon, give them a gift that pertains to another one of their hobbies.
This blog is satirical, yes, but it also clearly displays the problem of accessibility in our sport. In my “how to get started in Triathlon” blog, I talk about the cost issue. I still use my moms old road bike, go to the pool for $3 per swim, and save money everywhere I can.
This is why I am writing this newsletter. To raise awareness and find solutions on how to improve accessibility in Triathlon. Also to advocate for more hot pink in the sport, just saying.
See you next time and if you really want to buy me anything above for Christmas I won’t say no.
Lauren “never flying commercial to a race again” Hogg.
Q&A:
Q: What training platform you use over the winter?
A: I use Zwift it’s like Sims for biking. It costs $22 cad per month or $189 cad per year. So maybe That’s a gift you can get a loved one!
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